Someone Like You - Prose

13 years ago, this very day, I remember; Sumio leaned over to whisper into my ear <<When you're 30 and I'm 36, and we're not so young anymore, I'll take your hand and say 'Guinevere, we made it.' And you'll say 'I am not afraid to keep on living, I am not afraid to walk this world alone.' on this particular day. Happy New Year honey…>>. Even though he was drunk when he said this, I knew he had meant it. He meant we would never part. That we were taking each other to the end. How was I supposed to know it was all a little misunderstanding? (I'm being ethical enough by not calling it a lie) How was I supposed to know that he would run off with a girl? Get married? Become a father?  Well my dear Sumio, I AM afraid to keep on living. I AM afraid to walk this world alone.
***
I stared at my booze. I stared at my little white bottle of little white pills. They shined, just like the new layer of snow on my window sill. I took paper out from the printers paper tray. I grabbed the first pen I could find. It was the pen Sumio had carved our initials on, with the wooden handle and the ballpoint tip. I shook it, to get the ink running and surprisingly the purple ink hadn't dried up after all these years. I scribbled:
"My Sumio, I completely understand so I don't blame you, guess she gave you things I didn't give you. I wish but nothing but the best for you."
I wetted my simple suicide note with tears cried over the days we never had. I took the pills, one by one, till my eyelids started on getting heavy.
Then my phone rang. Sumio's name appeared on the screen.
I ran outside, into the icy cold. Someone needed to save me. I wanted to live. I NEEDED to live! I answered the phone but it was too late. The world around me started to spin very fast and all I could hear was the phone finding the concrete floor and smashing into a million pieces. Next was my head, smashing up, on the edge of the sidewalk.
***
My head was throbbing. MY HEAD WAS THROBBING! This meant that I was ALIVE! I opened my eyes, blinded by the vivid whiteness of the four walls surrounding me. I tried to lift my head up but stopped once I felt this lightning go down my spine. It hurt too much. <<Hey there! You finally woke up! Stay still or you'll hurt yourself…>> I turned sideways –which sent just another lightning down my spine-  to see two enormous gray eyes staring at me, with an even bigger and gray-er hair-do. The owner of the eyes giggled <<You're looking at my hair! Haha! My curl-ball head is the first thing what ANYONE and everyone sees in me first!>> I had a hard time comprehending his fast speaking. I felt light-headed. <<You are…?>> I moaned. <<RAVEN!>> he roared <<I found you by the sidewalk so they let me ride the ambulance with you! My FIRST time in an ambulance… It was pretty cool!>> was he manic or what?! Again it took me a while to understand what he had just said. I closed my eyes to remember what had happened. Then, with horror I shrieked <<Sumio! He called me! He really called me and I was unable to answer him!!!>> the vibration of my own voice hurt my guts. I let a moan escape my lips. Raven, again in his annoyingly over enthusiastic tone shrieked as a reply to my shriek <<You'll call him as much as you like as long as you're still alive! And handsome, what's YOUR name?>> was he even allowed to be in here? Afterall I had just gotten out of a coma… He held my hand <<Guinevere,>> he whispered, He leaned over to my ear <<Guinevere, you made it.>>
You see Sumio, never mind, I DID find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you, TOO.